The past few weeks had been a real speeding ground for me, just like that "Qiu Ming Shan" (or something) in "Initial D", forcing myself to make the turns quickly and swiftly without losing control. People and events pass by at a blink of an eye, and i keep finding time for myself and for my outside commitments.

Film Camp was over 2 weeks ago. A sudden phonecall in the morning found me confused and stressful to take over the teaching of a particular course. The camp went back quickly and at the end, i felt we were just lucky that it was on the overall quite successful.

CS FOC needed me to commit every now and then, but yet i couldnt devote much time to them, and i felt i was injustice to the rest of the comm. i felt like pulling out every now and then, but whatever happened in hall production made me stay on and tried to keep on track with the deadlines (although unsuccessfully).

Hall Production was my life now. Yet, it is supposed to be not only dependent on myself. Yea, i'm the director and all, but that doesn't mean that i should come up with everything. i don't know. i thought i kept emphasizing i'm really open to ideas, yet... haiz, i keep getting this feeling that everything is out from my mind. i feel stressful, cos what if my ideas don't turn out ok? what if they don't work?

and with people quitting only now... not that i don't understand their reason, but can't they like warn me 1 month beforehand? "Is it a sudden decision?" "er, no, actually i thought about it even before exams" HARLOW! if u actually tot about it, tell me first right? and the printing of scripts aren't cheap oso u know?

i dun like this feeling, with everything on my back. i feel like the success of the whole show rest with me solely. That definitely shouldn't be the way! i don't like this feeling! drama production is supposed to be a team's effort!

and just when i really needed the moral boosting.......... today came.

Thank you Yeokie for calling me the very first thing u received my message. And thanks to Alvin for your concern about them.

Fifteen more minutes and i hav to be off for another meeting. How long is this road going to be?

*drained-physically-and-emotionally*,
Johnzzon